Letters, real and etherial.

Over the past few days there has been considerable interest in a comment made by Bishop Tom Wright of England. He said, "…After a summer and autumn of various tangled and unsatisfactory events, the Archbishop then wrote an Advent pastoral letter in which he reiterated the terms of his initial invitation and declared that he would be writing to those bishops who might be thought particularly unsympathetic to Windsor and the Covenant to ask them whether they were really prepared to build on this dual foundation. Those letters, I understand, are in the post as we speak…"

The question is, are there indeed any such letters, who got them and what do they say? For the particulars see Thinking Anglicans HERE , The Lead, HERE, BabyBlue HERE, and Ruth Gledhill HERE.

And the most important question of all is this: WHAT WILL THE BISHOPS WHO GET THEM, IF THEY EXIST, DO WITH THEM?

The traditional answer for unsolicited mail is to use the letters creatively while waiting for the next really important task to come. Paper Airplanes are a perfect, if somewhat overused, option.

All of this got me to thinking (having time to waste myself) just what the letter to these worthy bishops might say. We can get a clue from the Archbishop of Canterbury's words in his Advent letter:

"I have underlined in my letter of invitation that acceptance of the invitation must be taken as implying willingness to work with those aspects of the Conference’s agenda that relate to implementing the recommendations of Windsor, including the development of a Covenant. The Conference needs of course to be a place where diversity of opinion can be expressed, and there is no intention to foreclose the discussion – for example – of what sort of Covenant document is needed. But I believe we need to be able to take for granted a certain level of willingness to follow through the question of how we avoid the present degree of damaging and draining tension arising again. I intend to be in direct contact with those who have expressed unease about this, so as to try and clarify how deep their difficulties go with accepting or adopting the Conference’s agenda."

So here is a try at a draft letter, in case the Archbishop has not sent one yet, or is waiting for a perfected text. It also occasions a second possible use of the letter. If one does not already have a framed letter from the Archbishop of Canterbury, this letter is a prime candidate. Rejection letters make great conversation pieces.

DRAFT:

Dear Bishop _________;

You have received my letter of invitation to the Lambeth Conference and have written me indicating that you wish to attend. I am grateful for your confidence in the value of this conference. Not everyone, as you know, shares your enthusiasm.

I would have hoped that your confidence in {the Windsor Report} {the Covenant process} was such that your participation in the Lambeth Conference would be other than a hindrance to our work together. It has come to my attention, however, that you have expressed a decided lack of enthusiasm for {implementing the Windsor Report} {advancing the Covenant process}.

Would you please reassure me of your commitment to implementing the Windsor Report and to perfecting an Anglican Covenant? If you cannot in good conscience make such a commitment I would ask you to reconsider your need to attend the Lambeth Conference.

Although the Conference this year is meant to maximise deep discussion and sharing, it none the less takes place in the context of the struggle to better articulate just what constitutes Anglican identity and the Anglican Communion. To come to Lambeth unprepared or unwilling to work with the recommendations of the Windsor Report or the future form of a Covenant as formative of our discussions would be viewed as destructive. I am prepared to withdraw the invitation to those who are unable to embrace the spirit of this Conference.

Yours, etc...

OK. It's a draft. So, who would it go to? We can only wait and see if any or all receive the real letter, if there is one.

What else might bishops do with this letter?

Several possibilities come to mind: First of course is the always handy paper for disposing of chewing gum. See diagram for folding to the left.













Other possibilities include the popular roll up horn. (above right) This has been a standby for generations of boy soldiers marching about the dining room table. I am not sure how women and girls might use this favorite. The women bishops will, I am sure, think of something.


Then of course there is the very best sort of thing to do with unsolicited letters from persons wishing to have one fill out a questionnaire, respond to a sales pitch or otherwise divulge private information.

Hold the letter up to the light and if you can tell it is one of THOSE letters, without opening it stamp across the letter, "RETURN TO SENDER" and pop it in the mail. That ought to do it. Then go to the Conference.

Strangely I found Ruth Gledhill's closing comment in her Times Online article exactly right:
"Do you know what I hope? I hope - indeed pray - that everyone just turns up, whether invited or not. Then they'll be able to fill those 200 empty rooms at Kent University. And then we'll have a story to write this summer. Because otherwise, at the rate it is going, Lambeth 2008 is going to be the biggest non-event ever, the non-event that is perhaps precisely what is desired by Lambeth Palace."